> Could you elaborate on how you would approach getting to the root cause of the resentment? And then once you have identified the cause, how would you go about dislodging that?
Sincerity as to what you are feeling each moment is the first step towards it.
If you are actively denying or dissociating (i.e., meditation), you won't get to understand how it all works. Resentment, or any other affective issue, is to be curiously explored with awareness and attentiveness (what are the emotions involved? what are the beliefs? why do I feel this way? how does this feeling operate? etc). Once you have fully explored something -- and this is where dogged determination comes into play -- there comes a point where that issues vanishes like dropping hot coal. Not unlike ceasing to believe in Santa Claus.
It does take time and persistence in the beginning.
I appreciate the thoughtful answer. It's interesting to me that a lot of what you mentioned in this comment seem (to me at least) to be some of the core ideals of mindfulness. Out of curiosity, did you arrive at this through another philosophy or have you come to this conclusion on your own?
Mindfulness is actually 180 degrees opposite, as it leads to a form of (acute) emotional distancing. Having done Vipassana in the past I can also say that from experience.
That's interesting. I will check out your link a little later when I have time. A lot of the reading I have done on mindfulness has been less about blocking things out or distancing yourself from it and more about accepting how you feel and observing it as if from a scientific perspective with genuine curiosity. I guess if we take away the semantics, what is really comes down to is that you seem to be opposed to blocking how you feel or distancing yourself from how you feel and more about being curious about how you feel and studying it. In that sense, I think you and I are in agreement, regardless of what label we attach to it.
We are definitely not in agreement. When, or if, you get to reading it do a search for `mindfulness site:actualfreedom.com.au` in Google to learn more.
Apologies for the misunderstanding on agreement outside of the definition of mindfulness. I've had a quick skim of your first link and also of the selected correspondence on mindfulness. Obviously there's a lot to digest there so I will wait until I can give them the attention they deserve. Until then I have a couple more questions if you don't mind answering (it's fine if you don't and I will read your links regardless).
First of all, when you say:
> to be curiously explored with awareness and attentiveness
To me that sounds like introspection (correct me if I am misunderstanding). You say that disassociating from your emotions is the wrong way to go about it, but how can you do true introspection without disassociating a little? Otherwise wouldn't your introspection be clouded by your emotions?
I was wondering if you had any thoughts on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy? To my knowledge, the main idea of ACT is that you don't avoid negative emotions or feelings but instead accept them and attempt to passively observe them.
In any case, whether you answer these questions or not I appreciate the conversation. It's always interesting to learn about new philosophies and criticisms of other philosophies.
In the website you'll read that "I" am "my" feelings and "my" feelings are "me". Basically it means the identity (or sense of self) is the same as feelings; they are one and the same thing. There is no separate "you" passively observing "your" feelings and doing so indicates a dissociative experience (which meditation takes to another level). If you're interested I can send an invite to our Slack community where you can put forward your questions for others (including the 3 actually free folks[1]) to respond; just send me your email.
Sincerity as to what you are feeling each moment is the first step towards it.
If you are actively denying or dissociating (i.e., meditation), you won't get to understand how it all works. Resentment, or any other affective issue, is to be curiously explored with awareness and attentiveness (what are the emotions involved? what are the beliefs? why do I feel this way? how does this feeling operate? etc). Once you have fully explored something -- and this is where dogged determination comes into play -- there comes a point where that issues vanishes like dropping hot coal. Not unlike ceasing to believe in Santa Claus.
It does take time and persistence in the beginning.