Life is harsh, sure, but "perfectionism," is a terrible and over-freighted word for someone stuck in a double bind and suffering as the result of it. Consider the situations from which someone might acquire a pathological fear of some kinds criticism. A huge likelihood is that as the result of submitting to uncertainty they have been:
- personally abused and shamed
- made the object of sadism or cruelty
- humiliated to their peers
- had important things taken from them
- been isolated
- lost an important relationship
If you know someone suffering from a bind like that, find a way to tell them that "this is not that," and you can have a big impact on their life.
I don't understand the purpose of taking a good word "perfectionism" for a pathological fear of criticism and rejection, and replacing it with a random incomplete list of things that might have caused a pathological fear of criticism and rejection.
If you consider what the perfectionism is the effect of, it's easier to unwind than just saying, "oh, you're in a hole, you should stop being in a hole."
Describing anything as an 'ism' is a thought terminating judgment of it, and not a meaningful abstraction for it that yields information about what it might be caused by.
- personally abused and shamed
- made the object of sadism or cruelty
- humiliated to their peers
- had important things taken from them
- been isolated
- lost an important relationship
If you know someone suffering from a bind like that, find a way to tell them that "this is not that," and you can have a big impact on their life.